The aftertaste is gonna break my heart

Random pictures. Youre all in for a treat, but please forgive the pictures where I look gone and wasted ;)



My sexy shoes.



Ann, Snowie and I.



Shwe and I.



Jon, Ann, me and Navodi.



Karl, me and Ann.



The ladies! =)

Crazy For You
Written by John Bettis and Jon Lind

Swaying room as the music starts
Strangers making the most of the dark
Two by two their bodies become one

I see you through the smoky air
Can't you feel the weight of my stare
You're so close but still a world away
What I'm dying to say, is that

I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new, you'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you, crazy for you

Trying hard to control my heart
I walk over to where you are
Eye to eye we need no words at all

Slowly now we begin to move
Every breath I'm deeper into you
Soon we two are standing still in time
If you read my mind, you'll see

I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new, you'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you, crazy for you

It's all brand new, I'm crazy for you
And you know it's true
I'm crazy, crazy for you

This is so lame.

But I dont care =P

The weekend was fun filled. Baileys with milk is my new found love. Pictures when I can. Footbal was evil. I really really suck. Haha.

And if you wanna know how a girl survives, just look by her side.

I can honestly say that I wouldnt have survived the past few weeks without some beautiful people by my side. Im pretty thankful right now.

I cant wait for the weekend, as I am going to see my parents and also be a wraparound wearing bubble tequila girl ;)

"The stars are the jewels of the night,and perchance surpass anything which
day has to show."

Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy."
~Robert Anthony

When Paris Hilton popularized the "Thats Hot" catchphrase, I didnt realise then how much id be using it myself. Even when I mocked her. But today?

Lifes too rollercoastery sometimes. I was just reflective because last nite, the boyfriend visits me, with me in a sleeping shirt and ratty old pjs after a shower, no makeup no nothing, and my hair in a towel and tells me I look beautiful. And instead of fighting off that remark with a vicious 'Yeah right', I surprised myself when I said, "thank you."

See, I could never really accept any aspect of my outer being could be pretty growing up. My self esteem really took a beating in my adolescent years. I was just such an ugly thing growing up. And that affected my personality more than I can ever explain to any of you people. Its hard understanding what feeling ugly is to someone who never had that problem. I was domineering to a fault because I was covering up my own insecurities, of which there were many.

But now its different. No, I didnt blossom or whatever, but I think my features settled, ahaha, and Im just too over confident no matter what Im in that its deemed pleasant to the eye.

But in a weird sense, I also feel like my old attachments are faltering, my old insecurities dont matter so much anymore. I no longer need affirmation every 3 seconds. I can walk around fat and fashion impaired and still feel alright. I can be a biyatch when its needed and completely naive and gullible other times. I can laugh out loud at what I find funny, and voice my opinion irregardless of the popular vote. I dont care about the things I used to care about but at the same time, have even more love for the people Ive always cared for. I can go to church and have the occasional drink and cotton candy splurge. I can love chocolates and adore Counting Crows and I dont have to wear anything that makes me uncomfy. Im no beauty queen and sure sometimes I like feeling pretty, but the superficial shallow beauty I associated with being happy hasnt been a factor for me in many many months. And maybe to me, thats hot.

And perhaps Im just adapting with the fact that, with subtle changes here and there, the person I am now is probably the person Im gonna be for the rest of my life. And she's not so bad, you know?

She's actually pretty cool.

Its kinda a relief that I dont hate myself right now. Or Im not angsty or something. That despite everything Ive been through, despite it all, maybe for the first time in my life, I think I might actually be okay with not just my personality or a certain aspect of me, or my eyes or whatever. But Im okay with me. WIth being me.

Yeah, thats hot.

To love is so startling/ it leaves little time for anything else-
Emily Dickinson

Um, wow.

I think Im in love.

Oh. and completely random:



Jeff made it!

"Heaven's not a place that you go when you die
It's that moment in life when you actually feel alive"

-spill canvas 'the tide'

Yes, thats right, something evil or maybe even deliciously naughty possessed me the past week, and Ive been everyone. I asked everyone I saw whether or not I should move to a house from the dorms.

And last week, it became a reality. Chucking away all I know about campus life, I succumbed to an overwhelming need for change and a that lifestyle overhaul I keep talking about and there we go. I now live off campus. In a house. Its still under my uni accomodations but its nice and purty. Or as Joy (this guy we met living here too!) would say,"Its pretty tight." ;)

4 other girls live with me and its just all yay. Theres a shuttle to uni every hour on the hour so thats no worries. Theres a supermarket and restaurants and tons of other students living around so its just..yeah.Its a good change.

So, I have no net as yet and thats why I havent been around. Ill try and get back on according to our regularly scheduled program but until then..see you guys via texts and what not. Miss me!

Change. Its good.

And kidnapping Shwe for her 20th bday celebrations is def up there in my fun meter =D